Author Archives: Andre Adefope

One of the things I hear more than I would like to are stories from Christians who say how upsetting their experience of dating a Christian was. While it’s true that no-one is perfect, some dating decisions in church cause a lot of hurt and are unloving. We need to talk about it, and we need to: Say It Isn’t Okay, Tell God We’re Angry, and Talk About Wider Fulfilments.

Dating can be amazing, but it can also be confusing too. While some men are happy to ask for help and talk about the difficulties, some aren’t. But I do think there are 3 principles we can follow, (no matter what our gender is,) to help us date better. Namely: 1. We Don’t Need To Be Perfect, 2. Control Doesn’t Work, and 3. Everyone Needs To Learn This Stuff.

In the second part of this 2 part post, we move on from the theory about dating a non-Christian to the real situations we face. We look at specifically helping those of us who are dating or wanting to date a non-Christian, think it through in light of their hopes for a good and God-centred romantic relationship.

This question is often asked by Christians. ‘I like someone, they don’t go to church, but what’s the harm?’ In part 1 of this post, we can explore what dating a non-Christian may mean for us. In Part 2, we can explore it in a much deeper and sensitive way for people who are thinking of, or already dating, a non-Christian.

In the second of this two-part article, we will continue to explore the biblical teachings surrounding singleness. The important point we will look at in this post is the idea that the Bible never places single people into a single category.

In this two-part article, we will explore two important biblical teachings surrounding singleness. Namely, that the Bible never places single people into a single category, and that the New Testament places equal value on singleness and marriage.

When it comes to our faith and getting dating advice, just like with most other advice, we often add it to our existing framework. We take in what people say and try to make it fit with our existing assumptions or reject it. We may not even realise we do this. But true transformation begins with letting go of these ‘items in the box’.  

Often Christians are in a church with an uneven number of single Christian guys and girls. They want to be in a relationship, or already like a non-Christian, and wonder if it’s wise to date them. But the answer isn’t yes, no, maybe or sometimes, the answer is, it’s the wrong question. The real question should be ‘What kind of relationships do I want to build?’ Then we can decide if this person would help, whether they’re Christian or not.