Christmas

The season leading up to Christmas is an exciting time of the year. Not only do we celebrate the birth of Jesus but it’s a great time for all kinds of treats – festive markets, hot chocolate and marshmallows, gingerbread, seeing family, twinkly lights and pantomimes. Despite cold weather in some parts of the world, it’s a heart-warming time of the year, and it’s very worthwhile looking for ways to make the most of Christmas and feel connected with others, whether you’re single, dating or in a relationship.

It’s that time of year again – a time of TV adverts portraying happy families, couples and children gathered around tables of food or brightly lit Christmas trees surrounded by gifts; a time of parties and gatherings and people making plans. It’s a time of year that can be tough if we’re single, triggering and isolating – a season that sometimes accentuates our aloneness and reminds us of the things we don’t yet have. Unless, that is, we can hold onto hope. Unless we can expect for a brighter future. This is the message of Advent – a time of preparation, preparing for a celebration, preparing for Christ’s arrival, for the light to come and break through the darkness.

As we wave goodbye to 2020 and enter 2021, what lies ahead? While there’s lots going on in the world, one thing doesn’t change – there’s still a strong desire to connect with others. Over the 20 years we’ve been helping single Christians meet, we’ve seen that January is one of the best times of the year to embrace online dating. More people are joining, sending waves, likes and messages in January than at any other time. So, if you’re new to online dating, or are returning after a break, welcome! Now is the perfect time to get started. Here are just some of the things we’ve learned about Christian dating to help you connect successfully.

There’s a saying that ‘hindsight is 20/20’ but this year has really shaken all our expectations. No-one could have known this time last year what we’d experience during 2020. As we go through a Christmas unlike any other, it’s helpful to look back and see what lessons about love, life and connection we can take into 2021.

It’s been a trying year, devastating for some, so as Christmas approaches, how can we end it with gratitude, whatever our circumstances? I confess that I don’t react well when I’m in an emotionally bleak or dissatisfied place and friends suggest that I write a gratitude list or think of things to be thankful for. But that’s my first response. Then I calm down, take the suggestion on board, take out pen and paper and do exactly that. I write down 10 things I’m grateful for and most of the time, it works. Something shifts. And I often end up with many more than 10 things on my list.

Dating during this past year has had unique challenges. We’ve all had to cope with isolation, whether single, newly dating or in a relationship. When I was single and waiting impatiently for God to show me the right man, I found I had many moments of loneliness, impatience, frustration and despair. Christmas accentuated it. Every Christmas, I would say “This is the year I meet my husband,” and for many years I was disappointed. But every year gave me time to prepare, reflect and grow closer to God.