Dating & Relationship Advice

Whether you’re new to the world of online dating or have been a Christian Connection member for some time, it can be helpful to take a fresh look at your profile and approach. With new people joining all the time – and the ever-changing situation in the wider world – does your profile reflect who you are, what you care about and how you’re spending your time? Do you feel confident making connections and dating online? Here are some top tips for getting the most out of your membership.

Dating can be tricky at the best of times. We may struggle to meet compatible people or fledgling relationships may fail again and again, leaving us back at square one. Add in huge challenges such as the coronavirus, which has led to social distancing in many parts of the world, and we might be tempted to throw in the towel. So how do we hold on to hope?

The current guidance on not meeting in person creates a big dating challenge: how am I meant to get to know someone I can’t meet? On the surface, it could seem impossible to get to know someone well. But…Praise God! There is no reason to stop dating – in fact it’s a great time to start!

If you’ve been waving and messaging on Christian Connection you might soon be looking for some virtual date ideas. With the right technology, there’s something to suit everyone, providing plenty of opportunities to build deeper connections, get to know each other and have some fun. Video platforms make it possible to see each other while chatting, and there’s been a big increase in more structured activities too, from interactive games to couples book clubs, bible studies and live online events.  For those who’ve had long-distance relationships, video calling and distance dating will be familiar territory. But for those who haven’t – and for long-distance daters who need some inspiration – here are some ideas that’ll get you started.

Now we’re all staying at home and avoiding contact with anyone outside our households (I hope!), where does that leave us when it comes to dating and relationships? First dates are notoriously awkward, but at least if you’re in a pub or café, or doing an activity together, you can make small talk about your surroundings or what’s happening around you. Not so easy in a video call! Interacting through a screen may help you discover if there’s a spark, but it’s harder to really connect when we’re communicating from our individual bubbles. So, how can you get more from your virtual dates?

Social distancing. Self isolation. Widespread lockdown. So much about how we live has changed in such a short time. If we’re single, and especially if we’re living on our own, this new and rapidly shifting reality can make us acutely aware of our aloneness and bring up some difficult feelings. So how can we love ourselves and take good care of ourselves during these challenging times?

All of us have been tongue-tied at one time or another – especially on a first date. For some, it can be a common occurrence. Any environment or situation that brings on nerves will increase the likelihood you’ll struggle to think on your feet. The answer is to not put too much pressure on yourself to come up with on-the-spot chat. Instead, using prepared conversation starters avoids awkward silences, encourages you to find out a little about each other and helps you both relax and ease into the date. You can have a few topics lined up, so you can focus on enjoying yourself. So, what are the best things to say and ask at the first meeting?

A friend of mine is about to join a Christian dating site (this one, as a matter of fact), and wanted advice on getting the most from online dating. ‘In your experience, HopefulGirl, what’s the key to success?’ she asked. I had no trouble giving her an answer…