Dating & Relationship Advice

Did you know that January could be the best time to meet someone new? Many people see the new year as a time for new beginnings – an opportunity to change our habits and freshen things up, perhaps by starting a new DIY project or giving up chocolate. But did you know that this month is the most popular time to join an online dating site? If that’s you, welcome! Whether you’re trying out online dating for the very first time, returning after a break or just want to freshen things up, here at Christian Connection, we think trying something new can be the key to success when it comes to finding a partner. Here are our top tips to help you find love in 2023.

As I contemplate the season of Advent, I’m aware more than ever of the importance of preparing ourselves for the good that is coming into our lives. Advent is a season of preparation ahead of the celebration of Christ’s birth and the day of His return – an expectant time, a hopeful time and a time to get ready for the love, joy and peace that is on its way. How can you prepare yourself for the love, joy and peace that’s coming your way?

We have the recent rise in video-calling for work, family and leisure to thank for the fact that we are now able to catch a glimpse of ourselves and how others might see us. How does this apply to dating? It’s the perfect opportunity to reflect on how we present ourselves and what makes great dating body language, especially when meeting for the first time. How can our body language help us come across positively?

Whether you’re a super-organised planner or not quite so well-prepared, there will always be moments when spontaneity is called for. Dating is no different. Whether you’re working round cancelled plans or suddenly find you’re both free to meet, a last-minute date can be really fun and a great way to spend time with someone doing something unexpected. Their unplanned nature often brings a more relaxed feel and can be a nice, low-key way to spend time getting to know someone.

Before I met my husband, I had a list of what I wanted in the man I was to marry. He had to be God-fearing, loving and kind, hardworking, patient. You know, the usual stuff. He had to be attractive – to me at least (I strongly believe that beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder) and had to be taller than me (I’m not tall). I wouldn’t say I had many superficial things on my list at all, but I remember when I started online dating and seeing some profiles – there were some good-looking men I couldn’t help but notice! I thought to myself, “If this is what the online dating scene is offering, I’m here for all of it!” It was only when I waved to one or two of them and got no response (this sometimes happens, don’t worry if it happens to you) that I realised that there were probably hundreds of women like me doing the same thing: reaching out to the same attractive men that we thought fitted the bill of what we wanted in a mate…

How often do we hear – or say – “I’m not going to change for anyone”, “I am who I am”, or “This is me and if you can’t deal with me, move on”? The idea of making changes to ourselves can feel like compromise – but should it? How does this work when dating – are we expected to change for someone? Should they change for us? Or can we remain exactly as we are, no matter what?

Have you read Bridget Jones’s Diary or watched the film of the same name? The fictional dating adventures and misadventures of a thirtysomething single woman in London were a big hit when they first appeared. Later this year I will turn 32 – the same age as Bridget Jones at the start of her adventures in the movie, originally released in 1999. I watch the film as often as I can but in the last 18 months or so, but the reality she and I will be age twins has begun to freak me out. So, with our age now in common, what has Bridget Jones taught me about being a single Christian woman?

When we’re looking for someone to love, it’s only natural to go dating with a picture in our minds of the person we want to be with, but what if this picture is sabotaging our chances of meeting the partner who’s right for us?