Dating & Relationships

Finances can often be a neglected topic when you’re dating, and it’s no surprise because -let’s face it – these chats are hardly the most comfortable or exciting part of love and new beginnings. But with money cited as one of the major causes of arguments and relationship breakdowns, it’s not something to be ignored. So here’s some answers to common questions likely to crop up when you’re searching for “the one”..

Modern dating happens so fast. We rule people out online before we’ve even met them or we check to see if anyone new has liked our profile on the way home from a date. At this hectic pace, how do we decide whether to see someone again after a first encounter or move on to the next?

‘My girlfriend and I recently split up,’ said the Facebook message. ‘She’s keen to stay friends, but I’m not so sure. I don’t want to lose her from my life, but I’m still hurting from the break-up and find it painful to be around her. What do you think, HopefulGirl – can you really stay friends with an ex?’

Years ago, at the very beginning of my quest for sensible input on dating, I read a book on how to get a guy. Bottom line: play hard to get, as hard to get as you can. The reasoning behind it: men love a good challenge and the more you distance yourself from them the harder they will work to catch you. Needless to say, I was still single long after reading that book.

If you’ve been seeing someone you met on a dating site or spending one-on-one time with an eligible other in your social or church circle, you’ll likely want to know if they’re on the same page as you romantically. This, in turn, leads to the age-old conundrum experienced by singles everywhere: when do you have The Talk? This can depend on several factors, so here are some tips for navigating the most common scenarios and defining the relationship.

‘This guy and I are interested in each other romantically,’ said the email. ‘However, he has a history of drugs, gambling, crime and even a spell in prison. He became a Christian during his sentence, which he says gave him the motivation to change his life. He seems to have turned over a new leaf, but should I be concerned about his past?’

Is there anything you need to let go of in order to make space for love? Is there something that’s taking up room in your head or heart and blocking you from moving forwards into a new relationship?

In simple terms, a godly relationship is one that glorifies God and one where God is at the centre. The Bible says, ‘can two walk together except they agree?’ (Amos 3:3) If you’re in a relationship that you’re hoping will lead to a happy marriage, it is worth asking yourself, ‘does this relationship glorify God?’ There are a few ways to tell if your relationship glorifies God or not. Ask yourself these questions: